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Why do I write?

April 25, 2017

Sometimes I write for you. 

Other times I write for me. 

Sometimes I don’t know where you end and I begin. 

And so it’s for both of us. 

Will we learn? 

Will we process feelings and move ahead?

Will we get better at doing what we do?

I’m so profound. 

This is completely trite. 

We are enigmas wrapped up tightly in predicaments.

And so it goes. 

And so we go. 

And so I write. 

Survival Mode

April 24, 2017

Staying in bed, feeling warm in the comfort of the morning and the calm before the emotional storm. 

Feeling sleep-stricken when the time calls for productivity.

Escaping into silly movies and television programs that barely serve as a distraction.

Making lists and then lists for your lists. 

Tackling every small, trivial item you can think of. Then writing those on your list so you can cross them right off. 

Talking big and feeling small. 

Talking positively and feeling scared. 
Seeking support and encouragement. 

Reading articles about fortitude, success and dreams. 

Baby steps. Every day, baby steps. 

How does survival mode make you feel?

A fitful sleep 

April 23, 2017
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We get stressed. We can’t sleep, or we don’t sleep well. Or perhaps we can’t stay awake.

A simple online search reveals a lot of articles about insomnia and other sleep disorders caused by stress. There’s much less about people who can’t seem to stay awake when they are stressed.

Some cases are dramatic, like those discussed in this article from 2013 in The Atlantic: Why some people respond to stress by falling asleep.  For the people interviewed in this article, they cannot stay awake after a stressful incident. People who start yawning in the middle of a fight or crisis.

I completed a DISC training a couple of years back. I’m trying to find my full report. But it said that people like me use sleep as a relaxation tool and coping mechanism for stress. Last night, I nearly fell asleep sitting up on the couch working at my computer. It’s not the first time that’s happened. By the time I got into bed and had removed myself from the stress-inducing computer activities, I felt much more alert.

Still, after a long week, I can rarely sit through a movie when Hubster and I finally get some quality alone time on Saturday nights. He always takes off my glasses after I fall asleep uncomfortably on the couch with my head at some awkward angle and my mouth open. The movie ended or the crick in my neck usually wake me so I can make it upstairs to my bed. It’s a glamorous life I lead.

Tonight, it’s the honey bourbon-spiked tea that’s doing the trick. I’m pretty sure that doesn’t count. But it’s pretty relaxing. I should sleep well tonight. I hope you do, too.


Now you’re cooking

April 22, 2017

Cooking with a young child requires a tremendous amount of patience. But the rewards are many. Valuable time together. Lessons in counting. Motor skills. Balance. Multi-tasking (the hold and mix movements simultaneously are challenging). Strength. Independence. Knife use. Making a mess of the kitchen. And, of course, fun.

We’ve recently completed a few kitchen projects together with yummy outcomes and good times had by all. I don’t think we’ll be filling our application for Master Chef kids any time soon. But I hope that we do more cooking together.

Who cares? Not me!

April 21, 2017

“Stoicism is a practical philosophy—it does not concern itself with arcane questions such as “Does man even exist?” but it was a philosophy designed by the Greeks and popularized by the Romans that at its core says:….

 You do not control what happens to you but you do control how you respond to what happens to you. The philosophy stresses duty, discipline, self-control and inter-connectedness.”

These are examples of the nuggets of wisdom I read daily from The Daily Stoic. Lately, they’ve been coming in seemingly just when I need them. Like these. Thank you, Daily Stoic

You never say the right thing

April 20, 2017

Your intentions are good. Your heart is in the right place. Yet the “right” words don’t come. 

You have the power to better a situation. You can say the right thing and help alleviate the pain. Yet you cannot muster the words that would make a difference. 

The wrong words could certainly make it worse. Inflame a situation. Piss people off. Create more negativity. 
For good or bad, words have a tremendous amount of power. Be cautious with them. 

What can you offer instead? What do you do as an alternative? Dig deep and think about it. There are always other ways you can help. 

A great big waste

April 19, 2017

When time is spent, there’s no getting it back. You can’t return it to the store for a full refund or even a store credit. It’s gone, baby, gone. 

And wallowing in regret for all that you didn’t do with that time won’t earn you a damn thing. Not satisfaction, nor pride, nor happiness. Nothing. Zip. Zero. Nada. 

So what the fuck are you doing with your time? 

Is that too much? Too angry? Overly aggressive? In your face? 

But that’s what we need sometimes. To be shaken, not stirred. Can you do that for yourself or do you need others for it? Does it depend on the situation? Yeah, likely story. 

So, what will you do with your time, friend?

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