Seesaw of Life

Does how we manage disappointment define us? If we crumble and cave, unable to process the letdown, are we weak or less of a person?

The last time I heard something similar to “We are going in a different direction,” it meant, we’re not going in the direction towards you. I had been excitedly optimistic. Up, way up. Then crash. I reacted by shifting my life into a completely new trajectory. And that one? Rocked.  I’m a better person for it. My life is better for it. Down and back up.

seesaw of life

Trying to find the upside to a seemingly down situation is challenging. And I consider myself somewhat of an optimist. A realist and an optimist. But working myself out of a funk is HARD. 

I journal when I feel angsty. It helps me release. I don’t really feel as expressive when I’m happy and things are going great. Maybe because I’m too busy being happy. When I’m sad, the sofa is my best friend, and my brain just churns and churns. I process thoughts by writing about them. I have bookfulls hidden in drawers of sad and surely very profound feelings.

I’m a little all over the place with this post; it’s reflective of how I’ve been feeling the last few days.

I was listening to an interview this morning with Pat Monaghan of Train who is now back on top of the world after years of ‘experts’ telling him his career was over, but now he has the top-selling single of 2010. Down and back up. Pat discussed how he’s found love and is happier than he’s ever been; it’s powering his creativity.

As I listened, I thought to myself, self, if you were a musician, you’d only be writing sad songs. What kind of songs would you write?