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Do you Skype your love?

April 16, 2010

Why yes, I do, thanks for asking. Well, I did. For a long while. But now I’m married. And really? I owe a lot of thanks to Skype. Without it, I’d probably not be married. Because how long can a transcontinental love affair last in this day and age without worry of huge phone bills and insufficient communication? So, thank you, Skype. I mean it. And if you ever need a poster couple, give us a call, and we’ll talk. I mean, we’ll Skype.

I digress.

“Do you Skype your love?” was the HARO media query I saw, and I jumped on it. (Side note: HARO is a free email subscription service that matches journalists, bloggers and others with sources.)

I pitched the reporter my story in a few sentences and awaited his ecstatic reply that yes! He had found the perfect source in me. Well, he wasn’t ecstatic, but he did reply, sent me a questionnaire and I gushed. Not realizing he was going to use my answers verbatim, I wrote my story in a way that would have been more dramatic (you know, with adjectives and stuff) if I had known he was going to lift and quote me directly. I had been expecting an interview or some sort of follow-up. Anyway, I followed up with Matt about the status and what else he needed from me. Non-committal response.

I searched for the article occasionally and recently found it. It was my little secret, and I happily leaked it to Hubster, my sister, parents, etc. I felt sneaky and romantic and still think it’s fine, even though it could be written better.

Here’s what ran in Match.com’s Happen Magazine:

Abbe, 37, CA
Abbe and her boyfriend realized they had something special just as she prepared to leave the country. They stayed in touch via Skype. One visit and a year and a half later, they married.

I met my husband while I was living in Prague and teaching English. He was one of my friend’s students and we met at her going-away party. We became friends and went out together to the movies or for beers. He really showed his true colors when I was sick with the flu and he showed up at my apartment with food to take care of me. Since I had already planned to leave Prague, we didn’t feel any pressure to get into a serious relationship. When we said goodbye, he said, “This is it.” I replied, “Not if we don’t want it to be.” I didn’t mean much by it — it’s just what came out. And then I left.

When I was back in the U.S., we started Skyping and quickly increased the frequency of our chats. We both invested in Web cams. He would go into work early to get on the computer and I’d stay up late so we could talk. We would also Skype for hours every weekend.

We never set parameters for our long-distance relationship, but we spent every weekend on Skype with each other, so clearly neither of us was going out to meet other people. Being so far apart, there was some concern about making time to connect online and worrying about when we were going to see each other next. On the flipside, we devoted  

We prefer Skype to the phone is because it gives us a chance to see each other.

much more time to just talking and listening to each other while we were online. We were able to make sure that we really, really liked each other. After we had been Skyping for about five months he decided to visit, so we used our chats to make plans for his trip. His visit was a wonderful, whirlwind road trip for us and we explored new places together. By then we knew there was really something important between us, so we had to consider our future. After he went back to Prague, we started talking about our options — specifically, about where one of us would relocate.

About 10 months after that first visit and 17 months from when we’d first met, he found a one-year job contract with a work visa and moved to the U.S. A year later, we were married. Today, our struggles with distance are about being far from our families — especially his — and trying to decide if we ultimately want to live together in the U.S. or Europe. We still use Skype to stay in touch whenever one of us travels.

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